A short list of things I’ve learnt this week

1. The pockets of pyjama bottoms from Gap are not very secure.

2. It’s more than possible for a brand new iPhone4 to jump out of pyjama bottoms from Gap and dive into the toilet.

3. When your brand new iPhone4 is down the loo, you don’t think twice about reaching into the bowl to grab it.

4. The first thing you should do when your brand new iPhone4 has been swimming in the toilet bowl is consult Twitter. After screaming, crying and running round in circles for a bit of course.

5. According to various experts on Twitter (@cosmicgirlie, @vwallop, @muddlingalong, @MTJAM), the best treatment for an iPhone4 that has been immersed in water is not to turn it on, and to keep it covered in dry rice somewhere warm (on your underfloor heated kitchen floor in my case). This will draw the moisture out. You need to leave it for at least 24 hours before attempting to turn it on.

6. When the water damaged iPhone4 still won’t turn on after 24 hours, you will feel waves of horror, distress and general sorry-for-yourself-ness. After 72 hours you will be so depressed you can’t even tweet.

7. After 84 hours, if your iPhone4 suddenly powers up, connects to your network and wifi and lets you make calls, receive emails and texts and access the App Store,  you will feel an incredible rush of joy.

8. That joy will quickly disappear the next day, when it’s obvious that the brand new water damaged iPhone4 is still very, very poorly and no amount of charging will replenish the battery.

9. Phone insurance should not be overlooked. And an appointment at Apple’s Genius Bar is my only hope.

10. The Pinky Ponk flies, and the Ninky Nonk drives.

This post was inspired by Victoria’s ‘A short list of things I’ve learnt this week’ posts that I’ve been enjoying immensely since she set off on her travels around the globe.

Updated 27-01-11: After about a week in the rice bath, my phone came back to life for a few days. My relief was short-lived unfortunately, and in the following days it developed a rather annoying habit of switching itself off frequently. Today, Ez, Fonz and I paid a visit to the Apple Store in Covent Garden. I was hoping the Apple Genius would tell me the phone could be fixed, or, even better, take pity on me and give me a new phone. Sadly, he said that it was probably only a matter of time before the phone died completely (the electronics really don’t like being immersed in water) and my only option was to pay for a replacement phone. Which I duly did, as I felt I had been separated from a working iphone4 for long enough. The only tip I can offer is that the replacement phone cost a lot less from Apple than the quote I got from Orange.

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